A new life.

No matter how much you want it, when you choose to change your life, expect it to be more difficult than you imagine, and expect it to cost a lot more than you want it to.  That sounds like advice.  I guess it is, but it’s really a revelation.  Revelations are funny things, because when you tell someone else a revelation they have an “oh, of course,” moment; but when you are in the midst of the revelation, it’s just hard.  At least, it has been for me.  So far, I’ve spent at least twice as much money as I wanted….and everything has been hard.  Things have just been hard.  They’ve been hard because everything I’m doing is new.  I don’t know how to get to the CVS from where I am; all of my belongings are in bags or boxes and I haven’t had a cup of my favorite tea in about a week, maybe more.  These are small things, I know, but when everything you do in a day, from taking a shower, to scanning a document, to making a cup of tea, is new, and you have to ask someone else, it’s hard.  But, so far, a month into my adventure, with everything being hard, and all of the complaints I have running through my mind at any moment, I wouldn’t go back.  Not yet.  We’ll see what I say about that in a few weeks, or months.  In the meantime, this is a beginning.  An inelegant beginning to be sure, but a beginning nontheless.  Tomorrow I’ll tell you what this is all about.  In the meantime, sleep well, and try something hard.


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